week four ♡ thursday ♡ bellamy blake, lief

[jokered]

[she's definitely nowhere to be found.

and that's a problem, one akira isn't entirely equipped to deal with for just about every reason under the sun that one could think of in this scenario.

but they need to tell bellamy what they know, and akira doesn't want to do it alone. for once, he's really not strong enough to handle this one on his own. he's sure bellamy, of all people, has noticed that raven's been missing all day—but mid-late afternoon, it's all but obvious.

he didn't want to say anything right away, though. just in case.

so with lief at his side, they'll approach bellamy, though akira doesn't really seem very capable of making eye contact right now. he's still visibly shaken, even if not outright panicking.]

...

[silent protagging hard. sorry, lief. you might have to say a thing or two for him to get this started.]

Comments

[reidentify]

[For better or for worse, Lief is used to being the bearer of bad news, seeing as how they were plenty in Deltora—and if he can announce it to a crowd, he can confirm it with a friend.

He doesn't want to think about what Raven's disappearance means. He doesn't want to think of being on this island without her. But he knows that Bellamy is far worse off, and that if Akira can't quite handle this—

Though he's pale, he does manage to look straight at Bellamy. Quietly,]

Bellamy. You have not seen her either?

[jettisons]

[It's obvious in every line of his posture that Bellamy knows before they even reach him. In contrast to Akira, Bellamy is intense, and he eats up the distance between them in long strides.]

There you are.

[He doesn't respond to Lief's question, but the answer is obvious when he turns to Akira.]

Where the hell is she?

[jokered]

[akira shakes his head.]

I... haven't seen her since last night.

[he's quiet as he speaks, voice almost trembling.

he absolutely failed to protect her here, even if there's obviously nothing he could have done about it. he feels like shit about the whole thing for entirely too many reasons, but he kind of also expects to be at the receiving end of bellamy's intensity.

or ire, if that's what it becomes.] I've been looking all day.

[reidentify]

[Though he doesn't know if the gesture will be appreciated (half of Lief's attempts are unwelcome, it seems, but he doesn't know what else to do), he lightly touches Akira's arm with his good hand. It is not your fault.]

If she went of her own will, she did not tell anyone.

[jettisons]

[Maybe later, Bellamy will be in the right state of mind to comfort Akira, too. Right now, he's laser focused on Raven and the panic steadily mounting in his chest.]

When's the last time you saw her? Did she come back to the hut last night?

[jokered]

[lief's gesture startles akira, though he doesn't refuse it. really, he honestly doesn't feel deserving of it when raven is his teammate and making sure she stays safe is absolutely his job here.]

She was in the hut last night. [after everything.] But she wasn't there when I woke up.

[reidentify]

[As far as Lief's concerned, Akira, as a person, is someone who deserves comfort, failed responsibility or not (however hypocritical that might be of Lief).]

It may very well be the work of this island.

[jettisons]

This fucking island.

[They've been getting nowhere for almost a month, but right now, he's terrified for Raven, and so the solution seems obvious.]

Then we go look for her.

[jokered]

I've been looking all day. Magilou and I scoured.

[but he's not thinking on the WANDERING INTO THE DANGEROUS PLACES THEY AGREED NOT TO GO AGAIN. so there's that.]

[reidentify]

I have searched as well, and I did not find her. If this truly is the island's doing, then we are not meant to find her.

[jettisons]

So you want to just give up and wait around until she turns up dead?

[jokered]

That's not—

[he shakes his head.]

You have to think of your own life, and Serph's. Lief and Prussia, too.

[they know the jungle is too dangerous already. they have to stick to the safe areas.

not that it's easy for akira to say at all. he clenches his jaw, closing his eyes; he could probably cry right now from how awful it feels to suggest that. but he can't let either of them go off foolishly—

but it's not like akira's in any condition to go, either.]

[reidentify]

[A flicker of hurt crosses Lief's expression at the accusation—because even if not to Bellamy's extent, Raven is his friend as well, one of his closest on the island—but he shoves it down. His feelings aren't the ones that matter here.

He keeps his voice level.]

Bellamy, if you do anything reckless, Akira and I will stop you. [...] And I will follow you however far in I have to, in order to do that.

[So yes, Bellamy running off into the jungle or some such would put multiple lives in danger.]

... And if Raven does return, she would be rather unhappy to find that you had gone off and gotten yourself killed while she was gone.

[jettisons]

[It's the only argument that could really reach him—he doesn't care about his own safety, not compared to Raven's, but he doesn't want anyone else getting hurt. Still.]

She'd do the same for me.

[jokered]

And if she did, we'd stop her too, because you wouldn't want her risking it.

[at least lief can make a better argument than he can right now. he's trying to keep his own head on straight.

...remember when he used to be the level-headed one who could keep other people under control? because he. really doesn't.]

[reidentify]

Indeed. I have no doubt she would do the same, but ask yourself if you would truly want her to.

[jettisons]

[He wouldn't want her to. Of course he wouldn't, but this is different. There's a part of him that insists this is a pragmatic issue—they can survive on the Ark without him, but they need Raven. Deep down, though, he knows that's a lie. He doesn't want to lose her.]

Let me hear your bright ideas, then.

[jokered]

You know we'd be suggesting things if we had something better, Bellamy.

[his hands clench into fists at his side—more in frustration at the circumstances than at anyone particularly.

but he doesn't have a better solution, and he hates that too.]

[reidentify]

Nothing yet beyond "win this game".

[And he knows they have no true lead for that yet. He can't stand it, any more than he can stand that the answer here may be to do nothing, but—]

But impatience is what the Chiefs want from us. It is why we are here, in this place that fosters recklessness and despair. Our foolishness that arises from our pain—that entertains them, and it encourages further cruelty from them.

Do not give them that.