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week one ♡ saturday ♡ magilou
[once he's cleared his head at least a little—it's probably time to head back to the huts. maybe sleep it off and try to feel more human instead of whatever it is he's been.
emotional. hurting. angry. generally frustrated. guilty about yato.
a lot of things.
the people in the longhouse probably saw more anger from akira than the entirety of the phantom thieves collectively between april and sending the calling card in december. so much of what he kept buried for the sake of everyone else, so much of what had been akira kept level by his team had slipped away.
his center of gravity is definitely off.
but a protag is a protag, and a persona protag is even more of a protag—so when he sees magilou shuffling off into the jungle on his way back? he has to follow. what the hell is she getting up to right now?]
emotional. hurting. angry. generally frustrated. guilty about yato.
a lot of things.
the people in the longhouse probably saw more anger from akira than the entirety of the phantom thieves collectively between april and sending the calling card in december. so much of what he kept buried for the sake of everyone else, so much of what had been akira kept level by his team had slipped away.
his center of gravity is definitely off.
but a protag is a protag, and a persona protag is even more of a protag—so when he sees magilou shuffling off into the jungle on his way back? he has to follow. what the hell is she getting up to right now?]

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it's too soon. his expression does soften a bit after she does that—he's not really trying to be hostile with her, after all.]
Not tonight.
[maybe another night, maybe another day—maybe he'll find a reason to talk about that where he's comfortable.
but after all that? no. he can't tonight.]
Just know it was deliberate. And if it's like that this week, it'll probably be like that in the future, too.
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[the fact that they know and can take advantage of everyone's most personal, intimate details really pisses her off]
Yeah.
Is break time over yet?
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which probably isn't help it anyway, but the underlying dread of getting back on topic certainly exists, even if his initial response is to sigh.]
Unless you have some other burning question for me to address.
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[she says that flippantly, but internally she makes note that this is at least the third time this conversation that she's made an effort to spare his feelings. it's weird. it's a bit out of character for her. but whatever, there are other things to worry about!!]
There are roles in this game that ensure at least one person dies each week.
What do you think happens if everyone with such a role is killed?
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honestly.
he pauses, frowning deeply as he brings a hand to his chin and contemplates it.]
Maybe we win. Or maybe they assign new roles? Maybe they just put an end to all of us themselves and pull more frame jobs.
[only one of those options sounds remotely appealing.]
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Lewin-Lief asked about assigning roles later in the game. Red shirt Chief answered negatory.
[so, unless Pal was lying. . .]
At any rate, I don't have any ideas myself. It'd make sense if it signaled the end of this charade-- no more roles dedicated to killing, and no one else dies, right?
But that's only if these murders don't serve any. . . higher purpose, I suppose.
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I just... hm. [it's like he wants to say something, but he's not really sure how to articulate it. he frowns for a moment, shaking his head.]
It's probably better to just bet on them incentivizing killing to the very end. [that's what he settles on.] Maybe we can stop it before that, but I don't trust them.
Stopping them first might be the only way to end the killing.
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[if that. and for her right now, that is a big "if"]
. . . and how do you propose we do that?
[a genuine question, not a mocking one. but she does follow it up]
Not that I care if you actually manage to stop it before most everyone is dead, or anything.
[why is she!! like this!!]
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[honestly. whether or not she cares—akira doesn't seem to regard it much because he already knows she cares far more than she lets on.]
They've put us at a purposeful disadvantage here. Things we could normally use to beat them—gone.
[like his personas and magilou's magic, of course.]
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[maybe she wants to care, and has been burned too many times to get her hopes up for a happier ending than what she's envisioning now]
Well, yeah. Can't rise up against them if we don't have the tools we'd usually use to do so. A perfect tactic to keep us all in our place.
[SHE SOUNDS. . . VERY WRY. . .]
[also if she had her artes she could totally melt them down and Lief could in turn blacksmith them into, idk. a teacup]
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he'll even add to that sentiment.]
It would be easier to melt them into scrap metal or turn them into ice cubes. Or nuke them.
[nuking them sounds fun.]
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[she could ask but she doesn't want to, so she'll just assume it's some kind of explosion. or something]
Think of all the useful things we could make with all that spare metal. And we even have a blacksmith on the island with us.
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We'd all be better off. And I don't think I'd feel any remorse getting rid of them.
[just sayin'.]
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None at all?
[. . . hmmm]
I wonder. . . does that mean you don't consider them living beings, or do you just think their lives would be worth it?
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[he hasn't met the persona-verse robots so what does he know. maybe he'd feel differently if he knew aigis?]
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What does it mean to "be alive" to you, then?
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[shrugs.]
Not wishing death for everyone and trying everyone like a game, cruelly and heartlessly. Maybe not being made of metal and literally not having a heart in their chest to beat.
[ugh.]
Something like that, I guess.
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[. . .]
I see.
[she perks up again, rocking back on her heels and shrugging]
No a bad answer. I wonder if someone else would provide a different one, though.
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[he doesn't know.]
I can only answer what I think it is. For me. Though... I forgot one thing.
[something that's so important to living—the fact he forgot this for even this long is telling of how out of sorts he is—
but akira recognizes that to himself quietly. magilou doesn't need to know that he finds this to be the most important thing.]
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[. . . no but she tried]
[a little]
[it was more like not trying at all]
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Freedom.
1/2
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[and the half-heartedly joking answer she gives in response]
. . . that's sort of like free ice cream.
Sort of.
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so does the deflection.]
Freedom wouldn't melt in a jungle like this.
[that's the difference, clearly.]
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[sighs]
Oh dear. I suppose I'm not very subtle.
[she gives in easily on this one, can't imagine why]
. . . I don't really have an answer about what actually constitutes "being alive." Truthfully, I'm not really sure what does.
[she's still trying to figure that one out. after shutting off your feelings for so long, the process of turning them back on again is just. . . well. it's a process!! and it doesn't happen overnight, especially when she still fights against it]
But! If I were to give a response anyway, that'd probably be mine.
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